F
fighteveryone
Guest
she told me lastnight a lot of people were pushing her to talk to me and whatnot over the past month or so. she said she hated it becasue she just wanted to honor my request for her to stay out of my life... which i had very angrily expressed to her. she had people she never even met telling her to talk to me and everyone she actually knew telling her to leave me alone. she actually saw me at a concert last thursday night and left immediately for fear of what i'd do or say. aside from me drinking, she thought i was going to blast her in the head because i was mad.
she posted a LJ post saying something that i had thought was regarding me. i responded to it becasue if it was about me i was going to tell her to keep me out of her LJ shit. she said it wasnt about me... but pretty much let loose on how much she needed and wanted to speak to me. how she misses me. about how she's tried to find "that feeling" with friends and that other dude. she told me flatout that i'm just irreplaceable and together is where we both need to be in order to have any sense of happiness in our lives. i had been under the impression that she was fine and happy with her life... but apparently that was far from the truth. i told her she could speak to me whenever she wants. it was that night that she came over and we did end up speaking.
she came over again late lastnight. we spoke more and curled up together, kissed a lot... all that lovey dovey shit. it feels really good. kinda like how it was years ago.
she knows i had lied about using gear for a LONG ass time. actually for a large part of our relationship. for that she does feel betrayed because i used to swear i wasnt using the shit. and at this point i just want to get her trust back in that sense along with her confidence that i'm not going to go off the deep end again.
we're just working to get to where we were years ago. and that goes for my sobriety too.
she posted a LJ post saying something that i had thought was regarding me. i responded to it becasue if it was about me i was going to tell her to keep me out of her LJ shit. she said it wasnt about me... but pretty much let loose on how much she needed and wanted to speak to me. how she misses me. about how she's tried to find "that feeling" with friends and that other dude. she told me flatout that i'm just irreplaceable and together is where we both need to be in order to have any sense of happiness in our lives. i had been under the impression that she was fine and happy with her life... but apparently that was far from the truth. i told her she could speak to me whenever she wants. it was that night that she came over and we did end up speaking.
she came over again late lastnight. we spoke more and curled up together, kissed a lot... all that lovey dovey shit. it feels really good. kinda like how it was years ago.
she knows i had lied about using gear for a LONG ass time. actually for a large part of our relationship. for that she does feel betrayed because i used to swear i wasnt using the shit. and at this point i just want to get her trust back in that sense along with her confidence that i'm not going to go off the deep end again.
we're just working to get to where we were years ago. and that goes for my sobriety too.
